I'll come back in a few weeks.

Can't have any distractions now, can i?

What was supposed to be a half an hour nap turned out to be a 3hour-long trip to the world inside my head. Haha that's probably why i'm not feeling all that tired yet. So yes, the stress level has risen yet another notch and people, myself included, are be becoming more irritable, are speaking a lot less and frowning a lot more. Oh, the things that exams do to a person. 

if it's a broken heart,

replace it  

I think the panic's setting in already. Like how it usually does just a few days before the 'big day' and you're able to really sit yourself down good and proper and start studying. Yeah, that's probably why i could study at home today. I didn't fall asleep like i usually do, or walk around the house aimlessly. 

I am now taking a short break because i think i deserve one. 

Oh yes, i like my new bed sheet and pillow cases. They're nice and crisp.  

Because there has always been heartache and pain

And when it's over you'll breathe again

So today was pretty unproductive like it always is when i study at home. You know how it is. It's just too comfortable and it's possible to do anything without having to worry about what someone might think. So every few minutes, i'll walk out of my room, grab a drink, go back, walk out again to grab some snacks, go back. After i'm tired of doing that, i sit on my bed because i think the chair's too uncomfortable and then i lie down and soon enough, i'll be asleep. 

Don't send me flowers when i'm dead. 

Give them to me now.

My Life

It's friday but i'm home early. Coooool.

More time for me to study.

Now isn't the time for me to be thinking of things like these. I should be concentrating on the homework i've laid out oh-so-neatly in front of me, i should be focusing on my Econs case study. I shouldn't let my mind wander off to some other place, something so unrelated to traffic congestions and taxes, subsidies and regulations. 

Half the fun is in the chase, the other half is knowing that you have what you want. After that, nothing else matters because you don't care to.

I'm a geek

Because honestly speaking, i like school. It's the not liking that makes liking so much better. 

I'm so tired and i've got so much to say. I don't think i'll be able to get everything down tonight. 

I don't think i'll even get anything down. 

I had tests for every single subject i had today. First a 2hour GP comprehension, then the Econs lecture case study test, after that i went for my much deserved break and then went back for math to do yet another test. Once that was over, headed down to Thomson Plaza for some Starbucks with Patrick to relax. I had good company and great music. Thank you=) Don't know why, but Dad was around the area so i got a lift home. I agree, i'm lucky and i'm spoilt. Sometimes.

Oh yes,

Happy Coaches' Day to my wonderful coach and all the other coaches too! The evening/night spent with the swimmers and coach was awesome. I'm glad it turned out the way it did=) We ate, we drank(non-alcoholic drinks from MacDs), we shopped and were merry. Oh, none of us remembered to be annoying, none of us remembered to take photos. Silly us.

I totally didn't intend for this post to be as shallow as it is but honestly, i'm too tire to care. Maybe i should have just left this for the morning or some other time but because i've already written all this, i'm just going to put it up. 

Good night lovely things!

put me on a plane, fly me to anywhere. with you.

I'm dyingggggggggggggg.

Hahaha sucks to be me right now

Let's Run Into A Wall

because we are so frustrated.

I've got a headache and this is strange because i have no idea why i'm having it. Or maybe, i do.. Maybe it's because of all that vigorous shaking of bodies i witnessed in Camp Rock(yes i watched it, yes i could have been doing something more productive, yes i'm childish for watching it, yes i'm a loser, yes the dreaded Jonas Brothers were in it, yes you can start pretending to not know me now, and yes i enjoyed watching it). Hahah i am such a geek. 

Tomorrow. 

Tomorrow will be a good day because i say so. Tomorrow will be a good day because i get to socialize again. Tomorrow will be a good day because i think i managed to do most of my work. Tomorrow will be good because will wake up early. Tomorrow will be a good day because of the new timetable. Tomorrow will be good because i made a wish that it'd be good. Tomorrow will be a good day because wishes do come true.  

I love how the littlest things can be the reason for a huge grin

New Timetable

I like it=)

Hahahah my two year old sister can now say shit. 

Pictures, Photos, Memories

I have more photos on my wall now and i like that. You know how people say this when they catch you staring at them 'Take a picture, it lasts longer'? Well, i think it's true. The moments won't last, but the memories will, and with the help of photos, they last even longer. Like, i just got some photos developed a few days ago and i had fun flipping through them. All of them brought back different memories, but all sweet ones. I might not have gotten photos of/with everyone, but someday i will. I'll make it a point to do that. I want to remember everyone, be it a dear friend or someone i can't stand. I want to be able to say twenty years from now, 'Oh, i remember that idiot! He made my life miserable!' or maybe 'I remember her! She was a great friend'. I want to be able to laugh at the funny photos, smile at the pretty ones, cringe at the ones with people i don't like and maybe even tear at those which bring back the less happy memories. I want to be able to walk down nostalgia lane when i'm older and not have the faces, which i can so clearly form in my mind now, all mixed up and cloudy. 

Happy birthday Christine! 

Hope you had a good birthday=)

Today was super unproductive but it was fun. 

I'm glad it turned out the way it did!

I know it happened quite some time back, but it still feels like being kicked in the gut every time i think about it. I've never really spoken about it because i didn't think anybody would really be interested. So clarence, thank you very much for listening and for saying all the things you did. =) 

Spent most if not the whole of today moping around at home, thinking depressing (but not suicidal) thoughts. Managed to cram in a few hours of studying in between and then i went back to being moody and stuff. Seriously, i cannot stay at home alone and be happy. How sad is that? But the stupid thing is, i love being alone at home because it's so nice and quiet. Sometimes i think i don't even know what i want or like. 

I'm speaking to Yan now and i think she helped me put certain things into perspective (as always).

=) thank you! 

It's ridiculous, How i feel the way i do. I know it's pointless, I know it's foolish. But i just can't help it. Maybe i really could.

I just don't want to. 

When i said something along those lines, this is what she told me:

its alright

things dont have to have a point

just like candy

thats why its candy!

It's amazing how a person is able to love/like/hate/dislike so many people at any one time, even more amazing is how we're able to harbor all those feelings, strong as they are, for just one person. 

I don't know how we do it. We just do.

I tell myself and others that i've given up, yet i know i haven't, not completely at least. I need to let you let me let go. But i don't want to. 

It's funny how we're willing to put up with all that pain just for those little moments of excitement, of exhilaration. 

damn it

HELLO You Piece Of Meat

I'm going to be heading off to the library with my little twelve year old sister to hit the books in about half an hour. Might be fun, might be a real headache. I don't know which but i guess i'll find out soon enough. I think i'm going to have cup after cup of cookies and cream milkshake and maybe ten slices of cake there. My sister will have double that and i think she'll make me pay for her. Haha we like library food.

Yan, you've been my best-est friend since Sec 2, you still are my dearest-est friend today, and i believe you will remain my closest-est friend forever. If i ever get married one day, i'll wear the dress you'll design for me and you'll be my bridesmaid.  

=)

The Musts and Must Nots

I must study

I must be disciplined

I must stop procrastinating

I must be focused

I must be good

I must not procrastinate

I must not neglect my family

I must not forget about my friends

I must not be lazy

I must not waste time(on things like this)